I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
my mom walked in on me smoking weed alone, listening to the eagles, and just staring at the river. she totally knew.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
dude. I can hear the air.
Randomize
