Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
me texting you is like we have secret walkie talkies.
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
Just invented taco cereal.
last night a police horse bit me when i was wasted. even the animal kingdom knows i'm no good
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
Ten minute nap on a staircase honey badger don't care
I love you. Mom got to wasted at the wedding that she threw up on my shirt.
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
Netflix keeps asking me if I'm still watching just because I've been sitting here all afternoon...why do I feel like my tv is judging my life choices?
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
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