we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
I am never drinking with the goths again.
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
That went from 0 to lesbian orgy much faster than expected...
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
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