the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
You blacked out and walked in on my neighbor breast feeding at 3am yelling "where is my best friend". I think we should go apologize.
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
You probably don't remember this but last night I bought you a lap dance from a stripper that had nipples that looked like runny eggs....you're welcome.
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
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