D3 body, D1 cock
He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
So my mom wants me to come swim with dolphins with my little sisters in October. I'm not sure how to tell her I saw a "when dolphins attack" special when I was rolling and am now terrified of them.
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
I'm about 40% drunk. You know, not drunk enough to light the bar on fire, but drunk enough to let the cougar hit on me.
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
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