Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
You picked the wrong day to call in sick. She's wearing the librarian glasses today.
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
I have just been informed that my company has ray guns. I WORK FOR ACTUAL BOND VILLAINS. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
Randomize
