ignore voicemail. the cock hath been unblocked.
Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
i need you to come over and tell me if you can notice that i'm only wearing a teddy underneath my trenchcoat
Randomize
