I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
Penises. Penises everywhereeeeeeeee. Penis ratio is sooo disproportionate. I can't NOT get laid tonight.
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize
