trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
I'm a fake celebrity on twitter. I need a life.
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
i just walked downstairs to find my brother wearing a crossingguards vest and boxers. when i asked him where he got it he just looked at me, smiled, and kept feeding the dog yogurt
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
It's only 10 in the morning...josh is already on the way to the ER for trying to shotgun a beer with a sparklers sticking out of it on fire.
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
You shoulda seen me try and clean up custard from an eclair off the floor while trying to pretend to be sober for my mom. Fucking hilarious.
Randomize
