I just saw a dog and thought "Hey! A goat!" Then realized it was a dog. Now I'm sad.
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
I woke up to them arguing over who would get my morning wood. Oh, and I was dressed as Santa.
He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
COCAINE IS GR8
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
Randomize
