Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
Some lady found my secret pooping bathroom at work. Do I fight her Highlander style? I made or may not be fashioning a crude sword from seat covers and toilet paper rolls.
Do it. DO IT. There can be only one.
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
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