ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
I was pretty stoned. I thought I needed a seatbelt at the restaurant.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
Can I even tell you how badly I want a day that is just on and off napping and sex with intermittent snack breaks? Because I want that day very badly.
I have never seen a more amazing text message in my entire life.
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
Randomize
