she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
dude my little brother busts into my room last night and yells did you know that grandma is hiding scrambled eggs between her legs
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
I wish I could donate my sober boners to my whiskey dick
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
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