all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
There is eyeliner on my toilet. Vodka and I have a love hate relationship.
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Randomize
