Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
i out mim tonsoeep
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