whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
3pm strippers are depressing
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
I just shit my bed. Go ahead and make your 40 year old incontinence jokes now.
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
Go ahead without me. This chick is buying me drinks and just found out her husband is cheating on her. I think I just found the next level of revenge fucking: Scorned Trophy Wife Sex
Randomize