If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
i upgraded from drunk texts to drunk e-mails...real world here i come
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
Can vaginas get frostbite?
YOU WOULD BE SEEING ME. IN MY KITCHEN. BENDING OVER MY OVEN. MAKING YOU CAKE.
Wait, that's an option?
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
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