i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
You held an empty wine bottle to your head and declared yourself the "wine unicorn." For the rest of the night you galloped everywhere and whenever anyone refused to be a wine unicorn with you, you tried to spear them with the bottle.
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
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