Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
they need to just BURY HIM!
Either allow it in a formal toast or i will drunkenly tell your in-laws while i'm dancing on their table. either way, the truth is coming out
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
Jumanji is 1000% better stoned while cooking breakfast.
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
I mean, on what planet are nipples suppose to look like that?
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
Somehow you're a lightweight AND an alcoholic. Rare combo in one person. Well done.
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
I think the cop who arrested me yesterday is at my gym rn should I say hi
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
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