well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
You were captain morganning on the laundry hamper and when I walked in you slingshotted a thong at me and started peeing. This all came back to me when I picked up some jeans to wear and they smelled like piss.
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
I don't suppose you have a recipe for a cocktail made of bitter resignation, regretting everything, poor life descisions and deep-seated self-loathing?
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
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