I can't sleep so instead I'm thinking of all the things I would love to do to you right now
That's weird, I usually just count sheep
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
Overheard-"sex" and "giblet gravy" in the same sentence. Best thanksgiving ever.
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
Randomize