I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
That reminds me...we need to get swords
I had a nursing patient tell me that her favorite drink was vodka and ensure...called it a colorado bulldog
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
I've never wanted to punch a 94 year old woman in the vagina, and then call her next of kin to tell them I just muff punched their Gam Gam until today.
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
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