There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
Just got arrested in my crocs and rolled up pants with a mr rogers sweater for literally fucking nothing can u come get me?
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
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