My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
Take 3 tylenol pms and try to whack off before you pass out. It's impossible.
physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
Randomize