I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
Just try and act like you're sober
I can't I snorted an anti depressant and he's pouring me tequila shots
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
Randomize
