Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
I came back to the apartment and he was waiting for me, covered in mustard.
needless to say I left
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
NOT EVEN KIDDING RIGHT NOW. THE GUY IN THE SPIDERMAN COSTUME JUST FELL OFF THE ROOF INTO A BABY POOL. GET HERE NOW!!
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
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