We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
I woke up in a poorly constructed blanket fort on a strange office floor covered in rug burns and champagne. How was your night?
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
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