dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
Randomize
