Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
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