Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
woman puking in liquor store parking lot at 9:30 on a tuesday morning = best commute ever.
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
I just mistook cooking oil for the whiskey that was also on the counter... They're the same colour. That was not a good shot... I need to not drink alone.
I just tried on my "outfit" for tonight and I should just wear sweatpants and a sign on my face that says I like it in the ass. That would be more comfortable
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
If one more person says Merry Christmas to me I’m going to take a pen out of my pocketbook and stab them in the eye
I swear to god, I'm like....the Jedi master of dick.
Randomize
