Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
Is there a non-awkward way to tell a girl I work with that she looks just like my favourite pornstar?
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
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