you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
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