Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
Ordered weed last night from the delivery service, and who showed up...my old real estate broker. He said, "this is less stressful." Duh.
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
Favorite thing said to me in 2012: It's like you have two tongues!
Were you keeping a list?
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
Fuck my life he IS a stripper, Ive been sleeping with a stripper named Phoenix. damnit, I knew the sex was too good
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
Randomize
