Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
wait one more day. tuesday is my official "i hit on you and/or we hooked up this weekend" friend request day.
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
Randomize
