the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
I drank so much Goldschläger last night, I could shit a necklace.
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
You called me and said "Aidan's unconscious" to which he said "I'm conscious, I'm conscious pilot"
He was filled with the holy spirit. And vodka.
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
A guy I don't even know just ate me out on a washing machine at a random persons afterparty. I came as it was going through spin cycle.Just kept thinking "who does laundry during a party?"
Randomize
