Taylor Swift is so right about you.
Apparently oprah and I were in competition to see who's ass could get bigger this summer
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
You dont lie about slip and slides
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
Randomize
