1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
Randomize