i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
It's all part of my master plan: have him buy me all I can eat pizza and all I can drink beer AND THEN tell him there was no spark and we're better off as friends.
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
Randomize
