some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
i drank out of a bidet.
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
Randomize
