if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
Ryan Howard.... the only guy who struck out more than me this weekend
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
I woke up with the new contact "Britney Both Nipples Pierced"... how do you think the night went?
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
Randomize
