woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again.
Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
I just tried to text you by typing "whoa" into my contacts.
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Randomize
