his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
Randomize
