All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
Say hello to your nephew Sir Isaac Meriwether van Catsworth
I'm going to have to start taking your phone after ten. That's when all the cat pictures come
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
Ugh I need to clean my floors/walls/ I actually don't understand why boys get drunk and pee on things
Next time one of us has a party everybody has to wear a diaper. But actually you just need a shit ton of disinfectant wipes and maybe a hazmat suit.
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
GOOD NEWS I CAN BRING THE VODKA IN MY LUGGAGE
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize
