I just made out with a guy for $7.
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
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