im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
I hate it when you make eye contact with someone bcs you are about to make fun of them and they take it as a hint to come hit on you.
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
I have unfollowed so many people the only things showing up in my newsfeed are dog rescues and sloth memes
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