We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
I'm going to rape someone's good day.
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
Did I see you at the bar last night?
Yes. You just kept grabbing my boobs and saying how much better they are than yours...
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
Randomize