guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
Lock the bathroom door next time you are going to masterbate with the shower head, okay?
I was just power-washing my vagina.
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize
