I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
I've blown a few things in my day
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
I just saw a girl drinking wine and walking her dog in footie pajamas and a mad hatter hat. First day of the new year and I think I'm in love.
I feel like you should put up a missed connections ad for this..
Please remind me tomorrow that I ate a loaf of jimmy johns bread on the toilet 5 mins ago
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
Randomize
