I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
i need to start buying Plan B in bulk and leaving them at the door. I'm really sick of walking to CVS with my one-nighters
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
Randomize
