it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
It's just like the Real World with babies
new years resolution: more sex, less car punching, more chipotle.
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
Randomize
